Will You Marry Me?

Choosing your officiant is an oh so important step. While we can suggest our favorites we'd like to leave you with some tips on how to find the perfect match. First we'll give you tips on how to find a professional officiant and then, if you're looking for someone more personal, how to choose which one of your friends or family members. Nailing down an officiant should be done at least 8 months before the wedding. This will help with the timeline! Most of these tips overlap but so read through the whole thing. It only takes a minute!

Professional Officiant

When hiring a professional officiant be sure to:

  • See them in action. Either live or on video. Watch an entire ceremony and make sure their vibe fits yours.

  • Get to know them! Have several meetings with them and get to know them well. You want your officiant to be able to tell stories or anecdotes about you.

  • Be honest about your values. You want your values to match

  • Talk about any special ceremonies (sand ceremony, religious ceremony) that you want to include.

  • Decide if you are writing your own vows. This will change the ceremony drastically.


Oftentimes couples choose to have a friend or family member officiate their wedding. If you choose this path, follow the tips above and the tips below:

  • Make sure they can and are comfortable speaking to a crowd

  • Make sure they are ordained IN YOUR STATE. Here's a website we like: https://www.ulc.org/

  • Pay for whatever fees they may incur. Your friend is doing you an honor and a favor, make sure you compensate them for their efforts.

  • Make sure you choose someone responsible enough to send in your marriage license for you. You don't want this to be the reason you're not legally married.

  • Read their script or write it together with them to make sure everything you want is included. Make sure they know the list of things they are legally bound to say during the ceremony as well.

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